Dan and Kelly, Hampstead Where ?!!?
Match #: 1965&1966
Kelly sent me a message, but I thought the "ice breaker" e-mail was a hoax ! I had not seen this formatted type of e-mail before! I finally replied to the mail. I liked Kelly's photo and when we started mailing, it was obvious that we had a very strong connection, and we had the same values in life, and had similar life experiences. Both coming from traditional backgrounds, but having been involved with Chabad for a while, and enjoying the learning and atmosphere. Ironically,Kelly's friend had created her profile, and had accidentally put that she was from "Hampstead". I assumed that she was from Hampstead, London, as the last 2 girls I had dated were from there....
After several conversations, Kelly told me she was actually from Hampstead, Montreal, Quebec! By this time, our Chabad Rabbis had spoken to each other (Kelly worked in a Chabad Nursery), and saw no reason for us not to meet. I had spoken to Kelly's friends, and it was good to have done the background checks.and gave me even more confidence that we could be a good match. That being said, I had never considered going abroad to meet someone, and had being dating a lot in London. I really was not going to come to Canada to meet Kelly. But finally, I went with my heart, and booked the ticket to come in March 2011. We got on great, and Kelly came to London in April 2011, and met my parents. I came to Canada in June to spend some time with Kelly. Although in some ways we are very different, we understand each other so well, and Kelly has the most kind heart I have ever known. She is so open-minded, and even though coming from a traditional background, has encouraged me to learn Torah, and we have become Shomer Shabbat together. Kelly has been taking kallah classes and has made her kitchen completely kosher. We got engaged in mid July, and we are getting married in a week's time, on Sunday November 6th 2011 at the Chevra Kadisha Synagogue in Montreal, Quebec,Canada! Kelly and I believe that this is all "Min Hashamiym"- from the Heavens (Hashem's will). It is amazing to think how you can date so many people in your own country, and they are not the one for you, yet someone across the ocean, thousands of miles away can be the one! We thank JWed for having made it possible for us to meet.
My advice is, never ever give up! As they say, it is harder for Hashem to make a match than to split the Red sea... so, do not expect to meet the one so soon. But, do not view a failed date as a failure... if they are not for you, think if they might be suitable for someone you know. And in this merit, someone might do the same for you. Be open to dating lots of different types of people, but be honest with yourself and know which qualities and characteristics are important to you, and the difference between what you "need" in a match and what you "would like."
Remember that the main quality is chessed (kindness and a good heart). This is a character trait that someone either has or not, and this is what above all, Avraham Avinu is remembered for. Torah and Halachot can be learned, unfortunately changing one's character is much harder.
Always have faith in Hashem - I have no qualms in saying that i said special prayers from "Aneni" to find a wife, and sent a letter to the Ohel: http://www.ohelchabad.org/templates/articlecco_cdo/aid/78446/jewish/Sending-a-letter.htm, asking the Rebbe to find me "an Aishes -Chayil, full of chessed, and wanting to help others". A year later, this is exactly what i have received in the form of Kelly. An amazing lady, with the biggest heart, and whose middos of Chessed is truly stunning. May G-d bless you to find your Beshert, and that you have only joy and blessings together.
Warm regards, Dan and Kelly
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